From the author: Interview taken by Women's Health journalists, published in May 2009 - Is there a way not to succumb to his moods? Don't let yourself get discouraged? The difference between pessimists is that they are capable of ruining any idea in the bud or grumbling when the optimist, on the contrary, is happy. How to protect yourself from this? And is it worth protecting yourself? It is important to learn to fully accept different people around you: reasonable and stupid, educated and not, optimists and pessimists. This quality is called tolerance - the ability to tolerate others, regardless of their personal qualities. The idea that, perhaps, a person who has a difficult quality simply does not know how to express himself otherwise can help to accept it. This is correlated with the absence of a limb - we would not blame a person for, for example, not having an arm. In this case, an analogy must be drawn with the psyche - a certain property of the psyche is missing, and not a part of the body. Let's say a person is stupid. Is it his fault that “nature did not endow him with intelligence”? A pessimist can be seen as a person with a special outlook on life who does not know how to look at it differently. If you accept such a person with his inability to look at the world in bright and cheerful colors, then his despondency will not affect you. The negative statements of a pessimist can even be “translated” into more adequate and positive ones with the help of a kind of “dictionary”. In this case, depending on the degree of pessimism of the person, his “terrible” for you will mean “not very”, and maybe even “not bad”. Before compiling such an internal dictionary, of course, you need to know your pessimist well. Some people show pessimism only in certain life situations. For example, a person suddenly experiences a depressive episode, when his mood drops sharply, he grumbles - and everything around him makes him dissatisfied. It is better to simply wait out such outbursts, letting the person be alone with himself and not touching him, since later, when this episode also ends on its own, the person will regret many words and decisions spoken and made during this period. Each “episodic” pessimist has his own manifestations of the beginning of his pessimism; it is important to be able to see this beginning in time and mentally say to yourself: “Aha, a depressive episode is beginning. So, I won’t take what this person said seriously now until the episode is over.” The pessimistic antics of a loved one are unable to spoil your mood if you have chosen such a strategy of behavior. Thus, you need to not so much protect yourself from the grumbling of a pessimist as learn to adapt to it, accepting the impossibility (or unwillingness) of such a person to look at the world positively: “Yes, from such a person. And I love him just like that!” - How to cheer him up? What words to choose when a person starts to “whin”? Is it even worth trying to lift the mood of a pessimist? My point of view is that trying to lift the mood of a pessimist is no less pointless than trying to lower the mood of an optimist. The question arises: WHY? Why did you even decide that a pessimist feels bad? Internally, he can feel just as good as any other person. For example, take the modern gothic subculture. One of its main principles is the thesis “happiness lies in suffering and sadness.” Why not? We all see happiness in our own way, including the pessimist. And it is not for optimists to teach him what happiness is. Pessimism, moreover, can perform an important function in the life of this person. For example, one of my close people, a talented musician and an “episodic” pessimist, claims that he is not able to write good music in an upbeat mood - to get inspiration, he definitely needs sadness. Does it then make sense to say that sadness is always bad? I do not think so. - Is it possible to make a pessimist’s view of the world more positive and joyful?.