For a long time I couldn’t understand where I got the need to “think for three” in my personal relationships? No, I didn’t dream of a threesome and a mistress for my husband, but it was always important to me which girl this boy left for me. And if there was no girl, then the boy was not valuable. As a couple, it was also important to pay attention - are they “coveting” my husband? And does he choose me? Even when the relationship ended, and I clearly knew that I didn’t want anything else here, I couldn’t be indifferent to my new partner... I had the feeling that I had wrongfully given the rightful crown to someone. At the same time, I never I didn’t strive for connections with married men and never resisted - the principle of voluntariness was important to me - he chose me. The moment of legitimizing me in this regard was also important - I never wanted to be a mistress. According to the terms of the script, if my role was not visible enough, such a relationship was not interesting. As if devoid of depth, they ended on my initiative, no matter what passions and treasures shone there. Now, sorting through the basements of the past, I realized that this “for three” comes from an unfinished experience with my parents. It was there that I got the role of the third winner... Dad and mom weren't married, and my father didn't want to start a family. In principle, I never wanted to (this is his story). But I was born, and he, after communicating with me! - made an offer to my mother. Bingo! I can! I’m strong! When dad passed away, the scenario changed a little - mom wanted to push him out and forget him, and with my whole life I showed how I could and knew how to love and remember him. I chose men similar to him, I showed my dad’s traits to my mom and those around me, habits, character. Now I refuse, I consciously refuse to “be the victorious third”. I accept myself alone, in readiness for a paired relationship... On equal terms. I am just leaving the need for struggle and self-affirmation in the past. And I no longer need a partner as proof of victory. Exhale... Having realized my own relationship scenario, highlighting my role and understanding what need it satisfies - through this quest, building new relationships is much easier and more interesting. I don’t encourage everyone, but who has their own rake I'm tired of it, I suggest we start revising the "cellars"".