The relationship between a man and a woman is a topic that will be popular at all times, and equally inexhaustible. Not everything and not always in these relationships is smooth and cloudless. One of these moments is dependent relationships. Dependency exists, of course, in any relationship, because it is part of the normal and healthy interaction between a man and a woman. Moreover, despite the fact that in society there are intensely exaggerated sentiments that interpret addiction as an unambiguously negative state, this is not always the case. With an adequate course of life, this is nothing more than taking into account the interests and characteristics of the partner. Unfortunately, addiction often takes on truly painful forms. Both men and women are susceptible to this. It all starts with the fact that a person, for certain reasons (more on this later), wants to perceive relationships as an ideal merger, whereas in reality, the probability of this tends to zero. A person, little by little, replaces true feelings by playing with them and convinces himself that this is actually the case. And people, in fact, dissolve in others and begin to live not by feelings, but by experiences. This is what can be called relationship addiction. With all the symptoms that arise from this disease: euphoria from the object of the relationship and withdrawal when it is not there, and self-pity is always an indispensable condition. A dependent partner is always in a state of victim; he makes this choice independently, although not always consciously. Quite often, a person, even if he realizes that he is dependent on another, tries to break off the relationship (I don’t mean marriage), thus trying to get out of this painful relationship, but as a rule this attempt ends in failure. A person proceeds from the fact that if the object is not nearby, then everything will immediately improve, but in reality he continues for the one on whom he is dependent and, in addition to this, he mercilessly “gnaws” himself for insisting on the breakup. Suffering not only continues, but also takes on new aspects. In this case, the problem is not solved at all, since this is not the reason at all. At its core, the cause of dependent relationships with a partner is low or inadequate self-esteem. I have already written about this before, you can read it here. Another reason for addiction in relationships is lack of self-acceptance, which is also based on the fact that a person has problems with self-esteem. Moreover, even the choice of a partner will be based on the fact that if I am not very good, then something simpler will suit me, and after a while, the person himself begins to be burdened by these relationships, but this is only if the person’s self-esteem closer to adequate. In couples where there is a dependent relationship, it is not uncommon to observe how the person to whom the partner is dependent begins to manipulate the other. It happens that such manipulations are very harsh and harsh. They can even manifest themselves in assault; this becomes possible also because the addict experiences the fear that, having lost this relationship, he will not be able to find new ones. This is precisely the root of what can be seen in such couples: forgiveness of any, even the most boorish behavior of the subject of dependence towards the dependent. If a person still wants to get rid of this condition, he needs to come to the understanding that he needs to put his self-esteem in order. Do not allow yourself to be treated disrespectfully, without taking into account your own interests, if there is an urgent need to exclude from your circle of contacts a person who is making the relationship unhealthy / for a while / A very important moment when an addicted person leaves a relationship, so as not to become a hostage to his own thoughts, he needs to fill his life with some emotionally significant experiences. Remember, the expression “time heals”, there is some truth in this, but it is not time itself that heals, but what it is filled with. The brighter and denser this filling is, the easier it will be to experience/