One of the diagrams that describes the insincere relationships many of us find ourselves in is Stephen Karpman's drama triangle. A month ago I attended his lecture on the triangle in Berlin. My goal was simply to meet and see the guru :) I was sure that the topic had already been thoroughly studied and there was no need to expect anything new about it. To our common happiness with Mr. Karpman, there was still infinity to study. Triangles within triangles, triangles of empathy, dependence and wisdom, positive triangles, scenario triangles and new approaches to exit. Stephen Karpman has a great sense of humor and just being at his lecture was therapeutic. To summarize the basic theory, he suggested that often in relationships a person moves through the following positions: Persecutor, Victim, Rescuer. The essence of relationships between people is that there is a person with a problematic situation (victim), there is someone who condemns him, criticizes him, demands something (persecutor), and there is someone who really wants to help or save (rescuer) the one who has a problem and protect him from the one who criticizes him. The bad news is that all three positions are negative, since they all devalue something. It is important that sometimes all of us have problems and they are objectively difficult. Sometimes we all criticize or demand something because we think it is fair. Sometimes we genuinely want to help. The drama triangle theory is not about these situations. It rather describes how we are used to feeling: - a person who has frequent problems on various topics and who cannot solve them himself, he really needs someone to do it for him. - a person who strives to help everyone, to do for others, to put their interests in second place. - a person who often criticizes (of course, to the point), demands, is not tactful. This is a conditional division, we mostly feel more often in one of these positions, but in relationships we move according to this triangle. The most striking and well-known example is the characters of the cartoon “Tom and Jerry”. Often Tom tries to catch Jerry, the mouse is genuinely scared and tries to escape, sometimes Jerry plays cunning tricks with Tom and the heroes switch roles. And sometimes the mistress of the house, a dog or another cat bursts into the plot, and then Tom becomes the victim, and Jerry sometimes helps him when the situation is completely hopeless. And these are typical transitions along a triangle, since the heroes of the film live in these roles and do not leave them . The scenario of their relationship is repeated over and over again. The persecutor believes that he is fine, others are not fine and blames other people for his problems. The rescuer believes that he is fine, others are not fine, that he is smarter and knows better what The victim cannot solve his problems himself. The victim believes that He is not okay, and others are okay, that he himself cannot solve his problems and is waiting for suggestions from others.