Why do we turn to psychologists? 1. To change another person. Child, husband or parents. This is one of the most frequent requests - “How to make someone else become what I want.” Children are obedient. The spouse is faithful. Mom is loving. We have hope and the illusion that this is possible. Here I will disappoint you. We can only change ourselves. With others you can only try to build relationships differently, accept or not accept their characteristics, remain in contact with them or not.2. Change your emotional state. I think we are all familiar with the feeling of guilt, shame, fear, anger, feeling of helplessness, resentment. Usually these experiences arise situationally and pass quickly. However, it happens that a person gets “stuck” in difficult feelings and cannot cope with them. Then fear, anger, resentment begin to “dictate” this or that behavior to us. We become their hostages. But living in constant fear, shame or guilt is unbearable and we turn to a specialist.3. To deal with a difficult situation, understand how it arose, what influences it, and what to do about it all. Alas, we cannot objectively perceive what is happening. Each of us has our own system of assessments and interpretations, emotions and feelings, an image of ourselves and others, ideas about how it “should be” and “what is correct.” And in a stressful situation, perception narrows. And then we don’t notice what doesn’t fit into our picture of the world and our idea of ​​what’s happening. The unconscious ignores and distorts facts. In this case, the psychologist helps to look at the situation differently, from other sides and angles.4. To change what gets in the way and start moving in the desired direction. Each of us sometimes wants to change something in our lives. For example: lose weight, quit smoking, stop yelling at your child, change jobs, become more confident. And we even know how to do it. And they decided to change. But something is in the way. Another Monday comes for a new life, but we continue to step on the same rake. In psychology this is called “resistance”. When some part of us, for various reasons, resists the upcoming changes. And here the psychologist helps us understand why we need it and find a new strategy for change. Your personal psychologist Maria Chernoval