Advice on how to push your husband to conquer heights can be found in almost any women's magazine. Write down the points that you like, make an interception plan and act. What could be simpler! But, corrosive psychologists advise: before you launch an attack on your beloved man, think... about yourself. The desire to be close to a successful husband may be a signal that you have your own unfulfilled ambitions. This shifting of one’s roles, feelings and desires onto another person is called projection in psychology. How it works? Let's take a closer look. For example, in a conversation it may seem to you that the interlocutor is angry with you at the moment when you yourself are full of irritation. Or a friend suddenly turns into an evil envious person at moments when envy is seething within you. This happens because internal psychological barriers protect your self from emotions that once caused pain. Do you remember how, as a child, your mother said: “Don’t be angry. You’re a good girl” or “If you’re jealous, I won’t love you”? It seems that you are still trying not to get angry or jealous in order to remain a good girl who is loved by your mother. Safe choice Do you want your husband to become a famous businessman, earn a lot, admire his friends and enjoy the respect of his colleagues? Yes? Then think about what your own life is filled with. Most often, a woman wants more from a man than he himself wants if this is her need. She just doesn’t realize this and therefore puts her “wants” on men’s shoulders. The reason for this behavior lies in childhood trauma. When starting a new business, there is always a chance of failure. Behind-the-scenes intrigues of competitors, criticism from well-wishers, lack of guarantees of project success - all this evokes emotions that not every person is able to accept and live with. So everyone gets out as best they can. In our case, a woman who achieves success through her husband will always be able to consider her partner’s successes as her achievement, and see the reason for failures solely in his mistakes. This is how she subconsciously protects herself from self-doubt. It would seem like an ideal option. In fact, in such a situation, a woman quite quickly begins to feel inner emptiness. It seems that she achieved what she wanted - she encouraged her man to earn more, but at the same time it seemed as if something was missing... Background irritability, dissatisfaction with oneself, the man and the whole world around him appear. What to do? Stop placing your ambitions and desires on men’s shoulders and be ready to face the consequences of your actions - both successes and failures.