I'm not a robot

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Living someone else's life. I'm upset and that's a fact. Something broke in our friendship, but did it exist at all? Why does a person need a friend? As a personal psychologist, advisor, or as a keeper of secrets......which will then still be conveyed to others with the note: “under the red button.” I'm upset and that's a fact. Maybe it’s easier to be alone, you go through life on your own and don’t bother anyone. You don’t interfere in the sense that without giving anyone obligations, there will be one percent less reason for gossip and insults. I'm upset and that's a fact. Our friendship has not been tested. I looked and saw how she was going crazy, arguing with her inner voice, the thought - “It was my imagination, it was my imagination.” One day I began to notice that She almost stopped talking about herself, but at the same time she was actively interested in my life, and after observing our communication I was only convinced of my discovery. I admit, I became scared, the fear of losing the person with whom I had been extremely open in recent years. Disputes within myself became more frequent, a painfully familiar feeling appeared, I will call it “cobwebs”. A couple of years ago, one of my clients (with a history of addictive behavior, albeit from social networks, philosophical fashion trends and fashionable aphorisms) introduced me to the works of Inna Pozdnysheva (literary pseudonym Martha Ketro). To say that I am wildly delighted, then no, no, but some of her quotes are interesting to me. “Unfulfilled love is like a golden egg with a dead chick inside. It would be a pity to throw it away; it is impossible to believe that the bird will not exist. The uniform is still impeccable, you wear it near your heart, but the stench is getting stronger.” This expression does not reflect love, but “our friendship.” Stop. You were told to pause and observe. I’m watching how she’s doing with others. Tyn-tyn……- also. Unfortunately, She lives the lives of other people, for other people, living their lives with them. Unfulfilled and undeveloped personal capabilities, problems with integration and fears interfere with the implementation of your life plan, plunging you into a depressive disorder with a psychosomatic symptom. The key is “Codependency”, and I almost flew into it, getting caught in the “captivity of the web”. Codependency in friendship and this happens. I leave without delay, although my uniform is impeccable and I’m being stroked on the head, it’s become difficult to breathe due to hypercontrol and interference, I’m improving in the art of being alive “here and now,” although I really love her (my friend). PS I’m starting to publish the promised series of posts with the general title “Friends”».