On March 8, the world is traditionally divided into 2 camps. The former wish women's happiness, love, beauty and desirability, the latter chant that this holiday is a tribute to the struggle of women for their rights and emancipation from men (and therefore the congratulations of the former are unacceptable and even offensive). And this is a very interesting phenomenon. Because, on the one hand, yes, March 8 is really the day of women’s struggle for their independence and the right to vote in every sense. On the other hand, in fact, wanting to be loved is as natural as wanting to be independent (these are 2 of the strongest human needs). And the world is conditionally divided into these 2 camps not because one is necessarily right, but because each of us something “sounds” more (and not only to women): - there is a man who wants to control his wife, and therefore gives her flowers, simultaneously “freeing” her from household chores; - there is a woman who does not accept and rejects her femininity so much that hides his self-dislike behind a seemingly more significant fight for his rights; there is a man who does not congratulate his girlfriend not because he supports her position of independence, but because he is afraid of being turned away if he shows disagreement; there is a woman who would be happy to develop as an individual personality, but is deeply convinced that her place is next to her husband, because her significance for herself is determined by his love, and not by her inner feeling, etc. There are many people, each with their own story. Therefore, today (and not only today) it is important not to divide the world into the disadvantaged and the disadvantaged, but rather to turn your gaze inward: “What do I want?”, “What specific needs do I have?” and allow yourself to experience and feel different, even sometimes contradictory experiences. After all, there is no right and wrong. There is only you and your personal, complex and fulfilling inner world that can change. And whatever you want, the main thing is that this choice is conscious - from an observing and attentive position towards yourself. Ivan Sanarvin - psychologist, clinical psychologist.