You have started a family, or in marriage you are planning to give birth to a “little miracle” into the family, and this is the moment of the brightest hopes and plans. And now the long-awaited wait has happened! Pregnancy has arrived!!! Plans are happily being made in your head - “about hats and slippers”, about another great love, about how your life will be rich in joy, children’s laughter, the happiness of creation... You dream of quickly looking at your continuation in everything - your appearance , eyes, character, genetics. You can’t wait to realize your purpose on Earth - to create and raise offspring! The state of pregnancy is a favorable time for “pampering” yourself, “indulging” your desires, feeling special and unique at the moment. And society supports this state - “pregnant women cannot be refused,” etc. A woman often expects more care, attention and love from others, because at the moment she is the creator of a new person on earth! And one wonderful day, your plans are collapsing. You are informed that the pregnancy is frozen and you need a terrible operation called “curettage.” Fear, pain, disappointment, death, the collapse of the brightest and purest hopes, shame, anger, guilt and a huge number of feelings float to the surface. And there are also a lot of questions: “Why?”, “For what?”, “Why?” And the stage of searching for answers, choking with different feelings, rebuilding relationships and saying goodbye to your hopes and plans begins... How to survive this difficult and painful stage in life? In psychology, this stage is usually considered from the standpoint of living through the stages of grief or loss. Each stage of grief is characterized by an approximate time period and the most clearly manifested feelings in each stage. I will now briefly describe them, but I would like you not to get too attached to these conventional frameworks, since each case is individual and unique, both in terms of the time of experience and the mixing of feelings. I would like to note only one thing that the norm is to go through these stages within 1 - 1.5 years. If grief drags on, you need to contact a specialist psychologist who can help you live through your feelings and complete this difficult stage in life. Stage 1 - shock, numbness. It appears in the first 24-48 hours after the event. The psyche is not able to so quickly realize the severity of this moment and psychological defenses block a sharp awareness of the information so that the pain is less severe and the person is able to cope with it. The same condition occurs and is characteristic of physical pain, when a person does not feel pain for several hours and does not feel everything that happened to him. The person seems to be in the unreality of what is happening; it often seems that this did not happen to him. Stage 2 - denial. Characterized by disbelief in the reality of loss. The psyche is still not ready to come to terms with the fact and continues to defend itself in such a detached way. Stage 3 - aggression, anger, hostility towards others. At this stage, an understanding of what is happening begins to appear and many different feelings begin to sway inside. One of these feelings is the search for guilt, one’s own or those around others, for the fact that this event occurred. “If only I had done this and that...”, “If the doctors had noticed in time, diagnosed and prevented”, “If my husband had not taken his time,” etc. thoughts are constantly spinning in my head. Here I would like to note that searching for guilt is like an attempt to reverse events, a desire to “find and correct a mistake,” to return what was gone. These feelings indicate internal resistance to accepting the event and relate to the reaction of acute grief. It is important to understand, on a logical level, that this event cannot be changed. Time cannot be turned back and we can begin the internal work of accepting the loss. A very common accompaniment of guilt is aggression towards others or oneself. Internally, this also refers to the process of resistance and non-acceptance, only in a more pronounced energetically charged form. In this case, there may be obvious accusations against the medical staff,.