How often do you feel sorry for yourself? Is it worth spending time on pity and what does it cost? Let's speculate. People have different relationships with self-pity. Someone lies on the couch and time after time finds reasons to feel sorry for themselves, remembering and going over the situations that caused pain, and using them as a justification for their incapacity. Someone has never even heard of this concept, and from morning to evening works three jobs, and then runs to the gym, despite fatigue and a lot of negative feelings, which they push deeper in order to “be on top”, not to give up, etc. d. As a rule, such people receive instructions from their parents in childhood - “be strong” and unconsciously follow it. With such a message, sensitivity disappears, which means there is no contact with oneself. The price for this is not small. One day you will have to pay, maybe in the form of a disease, maybe emotionally, or maybe something else... It happens that these two poles actively manifest themselves in one person. At first he puts on a Superman mask and rushes into the field to chase flies, but then the limit comes, and the mask is replaced by powerlessness and emptiness. At such moments, you want someone to take care, but the problem is that the person has been strong for so long that those around him don’t even suspect that he needs it. But he’s not used to asking, so he falls into pity. But all this is not healthy pity, which is about love and caring for oneself, but destructive, bringing disappointment and pain. Balance is important here. Heroism to the detriment of oneself or constant “self-pity” are two extremes of the same dislike for oneself. Sometimes you can afford them, but living like this all the time is too risky. Self-pity is a surrogate for love, it takes away energy, forces you to live in the past and, as a result, is very expensive. It is closely associated with wretchedness (the feeling that something is wrong with me), which does not allow one to treat oneself with respect and feel dignity. Therefore, it is important to deal with it in order to have the opportunity to feel love for yourself. Wretchedness is the territory of Universal Therapy; this term is not used in other areas. Nevertheless, there are ways to weaken the influence of self-pity without VseLenka (although it is much easier and faster with it). I'll tell you about simple ones: 1. Realize the problem and take responsibility for your actions. Only you are the creator of your life, and this position is more effective.2. Write a list of all your achievements and advantages, everything that you can be proud of. This will help increase self-esteem and understand that in any case you are a unique person.3. Take time to show yourself care and love when planning big tasks. I am sure you will succeed! Take care of yourself and all the best to you! PS What is your relationship with pity? If it worries you, welcome to a consultation. Sign up via direct message.