Unpleasant, I will say, awareness of the advantages of another person, and our desire to have the same advantages. Sound familiar? Some people are so poisoned by this very envy that it becomes poison for them. It permeates their existence from top to bottom. what is the reason? The reason is in the child-parent relationship! On the one hand, there is dissatisfaction with the child, he is less talented, smart, handsome, etc. And the expectation from the child when he will become one!!! The child becomes convinced for the rest of his life that he cannot achieve any of this. On the other hand, the parents exaggerate the child’s talents, intelligence, etc., inflated expectations. But no amount of ambition helps the child “prove to the whole world” that he is capable. Envy is a very unpleasant emotion! Our culture and faith condemns envy and we are ashamed of it, but it goes deeper and eats more and more. We are in a state of painful awareness that someone has something that we do not possess. Because an envious person is initially convinced of his inferiority, every pang of envy that he feels intensifies his suffering. And what does the envious - suffering? - right! - CRITICIZE. come up with explanations like: “it’s unfair”, the one who has everything is necessarily bad and does not deserve everything that he has. This desire of chronically envious people to distort reality is very dangerous. More global, true feelings are hidden under this envy. But in every minus there are pluses - envy can also be a good material for self-therapy... Self-therapy technique1. Realize your inadequate reaction. (for example: I am in a dialogue with a client about the overprotection of their child. I realize that I am irritated.) I catch myself in this inadequate reaction. 2. Feel a superficial emotion. An external experience. (in my case, anger , condemnation, I condemn the parents of this girl.) 3. What does this remind me of? (in my case, it reminds me of my anger and condemnation of my parents, or rather my father to a greater extent, when he was not interested in me at all, and all that remained to do in distant childhood is to get sick with pneumonia, bronchitis, etc. And for what? To attract attention.. so that they feel sorry and show sympathy. It’s all about love. My hidden feeling came to the surface! I mentally returned to childhood. My the inner child was jealous, namely, the child of a client with overprotectiveness. As soon as I felt hidden envy, which lasted a moment, the external emotion of anger evaporated. The Adult turned on. Hidden feelings do strange things to our mind. The method is to write down questions and assumptions related with a hidden feeling. What do I feel? What am I afraid to feel? Why do I hurt so much? And the more questions you ask yourself, the better. When you get to the initial emotion that causes Envy in you, awareness will immediately come and you will understand, that envy and obsessive thoughts have passed. Peace and goodness to everyone.