Everything is very prosaic and banal: a man is resting with his mistress. From family life, from problems, from worries and burdens and responsibilities. Since a man is most interested in a woman at the very beginning of a relationship, he has a kind of honeymoon. And when it ends and problems begin, he dumps it on his wife, especially against the backdrop of heating up his relationship with her. While you had him, your wife had a surge, a surge of feelings for him, even if they were in a quarrel, he did not fulfill his duties as a man, was a disgrace to the family and everything was heading towards divorce. As soon as you appeared, the wife steps on the throat of her song, her mind turns off and she is ready to return it back at any cost, making a mistake, because the man is degrading at this moment. He was returned incorrectly, he has not changed, he has not corrected the mistake in front of his wife , did not begin to bear responsibility, he was returned to the moment when he committed the most irresponsible act, betrayed his wife. The wife’s self-esteem is as low as possible at this moment, the husband’s self-esteem is as high as possible, he is a valuable trophy, and the mistress’s self-esteem also drops. Thus, the man devalued two women, taking all the value onto himself. Because of the rubber band effect, which I wrote about in the previous article, he cannot choose anyone between them, he dangles back and forth, but he doesn’t need this, and it’s not profitable, but why? They love him, they constantly wait for him with open arms, they solve his problems. In my practice, there are many cases when mistresses try to win him over to their side, offering additional bonuses - help in business, services, small and large, investing money in his business, take on his loans, give birth to children, etc. But this doesn’t work: a man is caught and hooked only by what he himself has invested effort, attention, money into. If you rely on love and his decency, then you are at great risk, because love is a very slippery structure, and a man will bypass the moment of responsibility very cunningly: I didn’t ask, you yourself wanted it! Abandoned lovers often complain to me that a man asked them for a child, and as soon as she became pregnant, they abandoned them. Do you remember the moment when he first suggested this to you, what happened then?! I'll give you my hand to cut off, the most outbursts of relationships do not happen out of the blue, if he suddenly offered you a child out of the blue, showed up with suitcases, some other bright event happened, it means something happened (bad) in his life . Someone gave him a magic kick, or the collectors came calling or something else. Here he is flying on a magic cannonball and he needs a soft landing in order to preserve his self-esteem, at this moment he resorts to his mistress, talks about the child, about life together, something else, that is, at this moment in time for him it is a matter of life - of death. You agree - you save him, he took a deep breath, shook himself off, recovered and moved on, forgetting about his promises. A man under stress does not even understand what he is saying and promising. Of course, he won’t tell you that he just got kicked in the ass, he will say: “Darling, I’m back, I’m with you, we will live together!” To test a man’s true intentions, that’s why marriage exists, girls. He does not guarantee you a happy future, because a lot depends on you, but a man’s intention can and should be checked, there is no other way. If there is no prospect for marriage, but you really need him (someone else’s husband), from a series of bad advice, take money, his love will pass over time, but the money will remain. In the concept of money, I include: very expensive gifts, including apartments, cars, career advancement. Otherwise, there is no point in rubbing shoulders with a married man; you will only fray your nerves and lose years and health. Do not agree to a relationship with a man until you check his background, do not sleep with him, do not live, do not have children until an application is submitted to the registry office, this is ideal. If a married man approaches you, confront him with a fact: I don’t date married people, you’ll get divorced?