For the umpteenth time, all your thoughts are about the existing problem, but “things are still there”: the situation repeats itself and repeats itself. Feeling tired and powerless from walking in circles. And in my head it’s like a cobweb in which the question is stuck and trembling: will this ever end?! Is this a familiar state? So why is “things still there today?...The problem is psychological - subjective. Those. it does not exist as such, like a cold, for example, when the body responds to the invasion of microbes. For example, in one family raising one’s voice is a reason for divorce, while in another they swear like they sing songs. A problem is a way of perceiving reality and responding to it, a point of view, an attitude. But if so, then why is it not so easy to leave the usual “bump” of vision on the mainland, where you can move freely, see the situation from different sides and act freely? Firstly, because attitudes are unconscious (that’s why working with the unconscious is important ), and behavior is often simply automated (including stomping on a “bump”), i.e. It’s also not very well understood. So the person is perplexed and angry once again, stepping on the same rake. And secondly, it is fear. Fear of change. Fear of learning something that does not agree with the usual understanding of reality. At one time, pundits refused to even just look through Galileo’s telescope, saying that all the laws of the universe had already been established, and nothing new could simply happen. And it’s not clear how to live further with new knowledge? The unknown, the risk, is scary: what if it doesn’t work out or, on the contrary, it will work out, but what next? And there are many more reasons and fears that maintain the stability of an unpleasant situation. For example, confirmation through the problem of one’s belonging to a family (not only the parent’s), clan. Sometimes this is called a life scenario, karma, fate. Even if in this familiar situation it is difficult and disgusting, but everything is known, there are no “surprises”, and this ... makes the situation easier. Yes, don't be surprised. The stability of the problem brings calm and confidence. Moreover, since the situation is known, it is predictable and controllable. Control is very important, especially for anxious people with low self-esteem. Thus, often the “victim” herself controls (and quite tightly) the “inviolability” of the state of affairs, protecting herself from new “surprises”. What else threatens getting stuck on a problematic “bump” of vision? The fact that it results in chronic stress (distress). And as a result - impaired memory and concentration; aggressiveness; anxiety; fits of rage; insomnia; depression; guilt; thoughts about the meaninglessness of life; diseases of the body: nervous system, cardiovascular, digestion, metabolism, skin, “female” and “male” problems, etc. What to do? First, let's look at what a person usually does, but first, a little about the characteristics of the body. The human body is a self-regulating system that strives for an optimal state of internal balance (homeostasis) in which energy consumption is minimal. The state of chronic fatigue described above is accompanied by low energy potential, in which a person avoids any additional energy expenditure. And any new situation requires this: for orientation, analysis, decision-making. The body's compensatory capabilities are not unlimited. In addition, the person himself interferes with the process of natural self-regulation by rushing to remove stress symptoms artificially: antidepressants, tobacco, alcohol, drugs. By the way, alcohol is not only a strong tranquilizer, but also a powerful energy supplier - alcohol is high-calorie and 100% digestible. It's an insidious thing. Non-chemical methods of self-regulation: “stupidly” looking at the TV box, shopping, gambling addiction, hanging out on the Internet, etc. I would like to note that the methods are considered not from the position of “good” or “bad”, but from the position of pragmatism. With all these self-regulations, there is a temporary reduction in anxiety, but the situation that led to the sad state of affairs is not resolved. What will happen if you do not resort to the methods of self-regulation outlined above? I'll tell you!